Recently, actress McKenzie Phillips, daughter of John Phillips of The Mamas & Papas fame, appeared on the "Oprah Winfrey" show. She discussed her new book, High on Arrival, which detailed the sexual abuse she suffered at the hands of her father.

I watched with sympathy and shock as she described the "consensual" relationship she had with her father from age 10 through 23. Obviously there is no consent from a 10-year-old in these situations. And because of the drugs introduced to her by her father combined with the authoritative power that he had over her as her parent, Ms. Phillips is certainly not at fault for any of the abuses she suffered.

This subject is quite uncomfortable for viewers, but how incredibly brave Ms. Phillips was to risk her own reputation and the love of her family to try to help others who are hiding in the shadows of fear, shame and guilt associated with sex abuse in particularly from incest.

People often question the motives behind victims of abuse when they come forward. As a spouse of a survivor of clergy abuse I know the rewards and negative ramifications of speaking out publicly on this topic. For my husband and the myriad of survivors I have encountered in the past nine years I know the overwhelming reason for coming forward is to protect other children. Survivors need to deal with the realities of their own abuse and the suffering that it caused, but more importantly, they want it to stop. They want the perpetrators punished, whether it's the next door neighbor, the parish priest or minister, the teacher, the coach, the uncle, the nurse. Whoever it is - that person needs to be stopped; and whoever knows or suspects needs to speak up. We are all accountable for the safety of our children.

Statistics are staggering when it comes to the reality of child sex abuse. I know it's uncomfortable to talk about. I know it's hard to believe that it could be that guy or woman. We are a messed up society - in large part because of the sexual abuse issue. Best estimates are that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be molested before they are 21. In addition, approximately 70 percent of those incarcerated have suffered sexual abuse.

Perhaps we, as a society, are paying an extremely high price for ignoring this issue and not working to prevent it. It will not go away until more and more victims come forward and become survivors. Each time someone comes forward and names their abuser, another victim comes closer to being able to do the same. Often, when an abuser is named publicly, it gives other victims of that same perpetrator the courage to admit that they too had been abused by that person. This is what leads to a preponderance of evidence that can ultimately result in convictions.

My husband started a local SNAP group (Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests) last year in the hopes of reaching out to others who have suffered from sexual abuse. Although this national group was initiated by victims of clergy abuse, it is open to any victims of sexual abuse including those suffering the effects of an incest experience. Support groups cannot erase a victim's experience or painful past, but they can play a huge role in helping people to live and cope with the reality of what happened to them. The most beneficial aspect of joining a support group is the immediate realization of knowing that you are not alone and you are believed. Please feel free to contact us for more information regarding SNAP or other support groups that may be of service to you or a family member. The truth will set you free.